“If Tyler The Creator went trap on a Juggalo record, directed by Eli Roth in a hardcore club” – that’s how MonkHammer excitedly described Ho99o9 based on early singles ‘Bone Collector’ and ‘Da Blue Nigga From Hell Boy’, so how does debut full-length ‘United States of Horror’ stand up to that hype? In a nutshell, it doesn’t. Whether here for the hip hop or here for the hardcore, it’s hard to understand why anyone would stay here at all after one listen to ‘USOH’, which satisfies neither camp with Casio keytar production, high school diary lyricism, the integrity of an estate agent and a complete disregard for structure or craft. Surprisingly low on lyrics for hip hop, and surprisingly high on wafer thin posturing for hardcore, the album constantly sounds like a studio recreation of that moment at a gig when your favourite song has built to an explosive climax and is brought to a cathartic close by the band thrashing every instrument. It’s great in the moment, but not for 45 minutes, and not when it follows a complete dearth of creativity. Although there are occasional flashes of something interesting, moments that hark back to the days when the Beastie Boys were morphing from a hardcore band to a rap act, too often they’re gone as quickly as they came, descending into scratchy, oooh-I’m-a-scary-man sloganeering and some of the worst bedroom beats ever condemned to permanence. On top of that, barked under layers of static distortion, the vocals are often so incomprehensible they challenge the very concept of language, ‘Face Tatt’ being a prime example with a chorus that could be either “I drink fuck truck, use my bed” or “Agro frap trap, lose my head”. It’s rare that music by someone other than Ed Sheeran or U2 angers MonkHammer, but we consider it a personal affront that an album like this has been allowed on any level. In an age in which Trump and Brexit won their votes, Leicester won the title, and James Corden became one of the biggest names in TV, the fact this album even exists must go down as one of the biggest mysteries of the decade.